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ATTN: the server at the Mexican taqueria

i used to come in a lot for tacos and tequila… its mostly because im an emotional alcoholic and whenever i feel sad i want a taco and a talk that doesn’t require us to understand each other. i know you barely understand me, and i barely understand you. but i think im certain in my deductions that we are both suffering from some kind of pain today that we don’t wanna talk about. yours could be related to the baby (or babies) that you have to pick up during the school year and mine could be because i find myself heartbroken by every person that says they’ll treat me better than the last.

i only know you’re a mother because you’ve shown me indirectly. you dropped the check early and didn't rush me to finish eating. and you said you just need to pick them up from school and for me to just pay early and enjoy my meal. this was all before 3 o’clock. it appears that 5 o’clock is not everyone’s happy hour…

either way, im sorry that you’re hurting… this sucks, and if my opinion is worth anything, i don’t like seeing you hurt, internally for that matter. and it gives me great comfort knowing that through whatever you’re going through… you still show up to work, as i still show up to have a shot or two… the best part about this relationship, is that you’re practicing much healthier coping skills than i am; so allow me to reassure you, if nobody has told you today… you’re doing a great job. sincerely with love and 30%, the drunk young lady in booth 10

ATTN: the gas station attendant that thought Juneteenth was a "new holiday"

...*le sigh* it doesn't make matters better that you are an older Latina woman that made a comment like this OUT LOUD (!) i'm praying for you & your family *rolling my eyes while closed during prayer*

ATTN: all my followers on social media

in case nobody told you... you're doing a great job! ^.^

ATTN: billie.jane.

i pass by a closed down boston market and i think of you every time. i'm sorry if this makes you sad... lol

ATTN: my person

i will venture every parallel, every version, and every universe with you as long as you're in mine... i love you, okay bye

ATTN: all non npcs that interact with me

i’ve always been a nerd and i love to answer questions even if i don't know it but here are some

questions i hate answering:

why are you single?

can I get your number?

where is the bathroom?

would you like another drink?

ATTN: bryan

dude, *bleep* you

ATTN: the one that didn't love me back

it was a pleasure meeting your friends from your hometown that visited the restaurant; i think it's interstellarly wild that they were on tiktok live and you popped in after ghosting me for months. mehopes your travels are safe and influential and that you of course learn something from it all; but i really would love for you to learn that you've successfully broken my heart again for not sharing. i love you & God be with you.

ATTN: those offering the attention i don't want/require

please, i am not coughing insanely out loud for the attention; there's a tickle in my throat and i have the flu. please don't think it kind to offer me remedies without asking what's wrong, "matterfact" don't ask what's wrong. i can come in with an eyepatch on (which i have already) and do me the wonderful favor of minding ya business please. i already don't want to be here, don't make me quit this job lol.